It’s 11 am as I recline on a lounger and watch tiny white butterflies skim over a private beach lapped by gentle waves in all shades of blue and green.
Georgia, the sharp-eyed and soft-spoken beach server, is offering me a complimentary Planter’s Punch, expertly prepared by Teddy, the resident beach bartender for over 60 years (that’s not a typo!).
This is Georgia hard at work. She is sweet, funny and barely breaks a sweat, even in uniform. The 11 am distribution of Planter’s Punch is an Inn tradition and one that is dangerously easy to get used to.
In about an hour, Donald, the beach waiter, will take my lunch order and, when it’s ready, he’ll quickly set up a table beside my chair for a toes-in-the-sand meal complete with heavy cutlery and pressed linen napkins. The setting could only be Jamaica Inn, which I have visited eight times and which keeps calling me back.
One of the Beach Wing rooms which are located, obviously, right on the beach. Cottages with pools are also on offer - I haven’t stayed in one yet but have toured them and they are decadently private; loved them. In addition, the Inn has recently added a few private bungalows to the property.
The Inn, which is painted the prettiest shade of Wedgwood blue, has been owned by the charming and hands-on Morrow Family for over 50 years and, while it’s set in the tourist mecca of Ocho Rios, is the antithesis of all-inclusive, party resorts.
This is a place where guests dress for dinner (white dinner jackets and floor-length gowns are not uncommon here); where Winston Churchill painted watercolours (there’s a suite named after him); where Marilyn Monroe and Arthur Miller wined and dined on the starlit terrace. It’s a spot where every room has an ocean view and comes with a verandah as big as the room itself and is thus furnished accordingly – think slip-covered sofas, coffee tables, desks and reading lamps for very civilized alfresco relaxing.
Dinner under the stars? Yes please! Sip aperitifs and nibble angels-on-horseback on the upper level before you descend to the candlelit dining terrace. The wing to the right, the West Wing, is very private as the verandahs here open to the water so basically no one, but the fish, can see you. Oh, unless the Inn’s black lab, Shadow, swims around to have a gander.
Fast forward to 2018 and not much has changed – thankfully! That’s just the way guests like it and why so many of them return again and again (me included).
It’s not for everyone: kids aren’t allowed and guests are usually tucked up in bed by 11:00 pm, but if you crave a quiet, calm and very grown-up getaway with a little bit of dress-for-dinner glamour, Jamaica Inn will not disappoint.
The view from the lobby makes a very good first impression.
This is another Inn tradition, although one that is nerve-wracking for me to watch. I always marvel at how the waiters walk the grounds, smiling and waving, as they deliver full trays of room service food and drinks - on their heads!!
Breakfast in the restaurant is beautiful but I like it delivered to the room. As you can see, they don’t scrimp. In addition to Blue Mountain coffee, pastries and piles of fruit, the Inn offers traditional cooked dishes, like scrambled eggs and sausage, or, my favourite, the Jamaican breakfast of the day. This is the salt fish and ackee, with local accompaniments like “festival” and “bammy.”
This was our room the last time we stayed - you can see the slip-covered wing chair in the corner, a shady spot for reading.
This is a reminder not to pose with a barman who is better looking than most models - male or female! I love that the night barmen wear red jackets and bowties. It’s very Old World in the best possible way.
Plan for the day: go to the beach, lounge, read, swim, eat, drink, repeat. Unlike most beaches in Jamaica, the Inn’s is completely private and fully dressed - there are plenty of seats and towels to go around so there is none of that very uncivilized “saving” of seats that seems to happen at all resorts, even high-end ones.
This is Albert, one of the helpful beach men. He is meticulous when it comes to folding towels, arranging chairs and raking the beach - a true pro.
The dining terrace by day.
The Inn is about 90 minutes from Montego Bay airport. They’ll have a driver and an air-conditioned car that’s stocked with refreshments waiting. The airport has a VIP club that’s worth joining before you arrive. For a nominal fee, you basically get to jump the huge customs lines. I never thought I would do that but, hey, I’m getting old and don’t want to waste a minute of the Inn’s hospitality or the Jamaican sunshine.
